When I left home I moved into a hostel in slough called SYPHA which stood for
Sloughs Young Persons Housing Association. I was having a great time, I finally
was out of an abusive household and I could live a life leaving the trauma behind
me. In those days it was unheard of, Asian girls running away from home but I had to
do what I felt was the right thing for me.
While I was staying at the hostel, one of the residents was chucked out because
they were not adhering to the rules. As it had been snowing I could not leave my
friend to stay out in the cold so I stupidly sneaked them in. Anyway to cut the
story short, another resident spilt the beans, leaving me and my friend out in the
That is when I knew never to trust or rely on anyone and at the end of the day
I was on my own. I had a few bags of clothes and the shoes I was wearing and
an adventure ahead of me so I thought. I was so wrong
The ground was white, the air was frosty and the sky was blue however my heart
black with icicles stabbing at my hands and feet. I spent my first night in the
doorway of a shop in the High Street. I was so cold and my hands and feet were
freezing luckily I had a few pounds on me so I was able to feed myself for a
couple of days.
On my fourth day I had run out of money so I did what I had to do. I walked
into Marks and Spencers in Queensmere, with my heart pounding and trying not
to look inconspicuous. I looked around for any sign of the security guards and
stuffed some meat pies down my coat and quickly made my getaway. I took
myself off to the car park at the end of the High Street where I was now sleeping
and had left my bags with all my belongings. I ate my pie as if it was the best
food I had ever tasted.
Over the next few days I would go into shops stealing food and cosmetics. The
food I ate and the cosmetics I would go into pubs and sell them to anybody.
I would use the money to buy hash and I would smoke away my troubles and my
nightmares away. I could not see a way out from my predicament and at times I
thought go home but I knew that was not a real option. I had shamed my family’s
honour and that there was no way back. I met a young man called Stuart who
had been on the streets but was now living with his girlfriend in Dedworth in
Windsor. He said I could stay with them but I would need to sleep on the floor. I
accepted the kind offer but after a few days I left and walked from Windsor back
to the car park. I felt safer in the car park than I did round their flat.
I carried on stealing and went into a shop and grabbed anything I could as I
knew there was always someone who would buy what I had stolen. All I needed
was to make £5 a day for drugs and food, that is all I needed to survive another
night in the cold. After a while I was arrested coming out of a shop and that
was the turning point in my life.